🎧 homophonic | pcs | yukichi (fukuzawa)

[silicone]

There's no need to fear the past. The past is just a memory.

(in retrospect i regret my choice of filter name)

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[silicone]

[ he shakes his head. ]

I just... want to sit somewhere and hold your hand.

I'm scared about tomorrow. I just want to enjoy tonight as best I can now.

[allmenare]

Whatever you want of me, I'll give it to you.

[He's scared about tomorrow too. Which is why he'll stay right there and hold Eiden's hand for as long as he wants.]

[silicone]

[ good. he will take them somewhere where the grass is soft and sit and hold his hand. ]

I'm going to find out who did it. Even if it doesn't matter at the next trial. I want to know who damned us for Shenhe's murder.

[ softer ] I don't want revenge, and I don't want to hurt them. But I want them to look me in the eyes. And I want them to tell me why it was worth it to them...

[allmenare]

On the contrary, it does matter. A lot.

People are being forced to murder, Eiden. Libby didn't murder willingly, and I would bet that the others are the same. And if someone is being forced to murder, who are they going to target: any random person, or someone who brutally shredded another person's body into pieces?

[silicone]

[ sharply ]

I get that. More than anything. I know we're forced to play a game where we murder each other one at a time.

... But I want to know. More than anything, I need to know. Especially because now... [ his voice trembles. ] Now...

[allmenare]

Then we'll find the answer. It might not be in time for tomorrow, but I'll find it. One way or another.

[He means it too. If this is what Eiden wants, then it's what he's going to do.]

[silicone]

[ he just looks downwards into his lap. he looks... miserable and uncomfortable and just. unhappy overall. ]

... Please be safe, Fukuzawa.

[allmenare]

[He feels insecure at that- he immediately things 'not Yukichi?'- but he just shakes his head.]

I can't promise that. Anything can happen here. We're only guaranteed today.

[silicone]

[ insecurity week comes for us all, but also eiden can't look at him, he's so unhappy still. ]

I still have no idea how it happened... it went by so quickly. Just. Suddenly we couldn't say or do anything that would matter.

Someone really pinned this on us perfectly. That's so scary... [ a small, sad laugh. ]

[allmenare]

There are people like that out there. Callous enough to kill without blinking an eye, and self-assured enough not to feel guilt when someone else is blamed for it.

[He gives his hand a little squeeze.]

But they're not the majority in the world. They're a very, very small group of people. Most people are honest, most people are good-hearted. And when the world feels dark, it helps me to think of the good that people do.

[silicone]

[ he nods a little bit at that. ]

I know. I have to just... keep fighting this unhappiness. I want to drown in it, but I have to do it.

[ he bites his tongue ] I want to fight for the happiness of my team, for Yakumo... for... everyone. But in order to do that, I have to fight for my own happiness first. [ and then, softer: ] Can you keep a secret?

[allmenare]

[Eiden is so brave, it warms Fukuzawa's heart. Even though he's terrified he's still trying his best. How could he not admire that?]

I'll keep it until the day I die.

[A pause.]

...you know what I mean. It's safe with me.

[silicone]

[ he hesitates. ]

I won't tell you the entire thing, because... it's a lot and unimportant. But. We can look at one team's rankings a week.

[ looking at him out of the corner of his eye. ]

[allmenare]

...and what did you see?

[That's such a useful power, and he must have seen something if he's mentioning it..]

[silicone]

I haven't checked yet.

[ gazing down ]

I plan on checking when the rankings shift on Monday.

[allmenare]

[He blinks.]

So you're not going to...

[Eiden's text message made it sound like he was offering himself up to die.]

[silicone]

I begged them to pick me.

[ he thought he was going to die too. surprise number 2. ]

They wouldn't let me. I don't know why. I'm the most useless of them all.

[allmenare]

[Oh, Eiden...]

You have a capacity for kindness and courage that most people could only dream of. In a place defined by death, we need that more than anything.

[silicone]

Kindness won't save anyone tomorrow. [ the insecurity is just... shifting to anger. ] The fact is, someone innocent is going to die because of bullshit and I can't do a damn thing about it.

[ is it raining? jk it's a tear on the top of fukuzawa's hand. ] I was trying so fucking hard... Gyuhyuk... he was just hurting.

I hurt him. Just for a bunch of people who wouldn't believe us.

[allmenare]

[EIDEN AAAAA

Fukuzawa lifts up a hand to cup the side of Eiden's face, his thumb wiping away the tears on that side.]

You're right, we can't do anything about it tomorrow. But come Monday, we'll start to rectify this.

I can plant a compulsion in someone's mind. There's no guarantee they will act on it, but they will feel a strong urge to act on that compulsion, strong enough that they might do it if they don't know what's happening.

You check the teams, and tell me who to use it on.

[silicone]

... Compulsion?

[ frowning softly... his mouth slips ] Yukichi... what the hell? How are you going to do that?

[allmenare]

I have my ways. It can only be used once though, so we have to make it count.

[silicone]

Once... [ he nods softly. ] Then I'd have to be extra sure.

For now, I want you to save it unless you really, truly need it. [ he doesn't want to imagine a world where maybe he fucked up and fukuzawa could have perhaps saved someone else, saved himself... something... ] I can't be sure right now if I can find out who the person is, but.

[ and this time he turns to face him. his eyes are just. so wet. and red. he's been crying on and off and it shows. ] If I can come back to you 100% certain... then we can use it.

[allmenare]

Of course. I'll hold onto it for now, until we're sure. But if you check a team with four people left and see them in first place, tell me immediately.

[Because there's only one way that could have happened.

But oh, these tears. He pulls up the sleeve of his kimono over his hand and tries to wipe some of the wetness away.]

[silicone]

[ he allows this, but god he looks... kind of frustrated and upset still. ]

There was proof that we didn't do it. We all... every one of us... I...

[ he shakes a little. ]

I don't care what anyone says. Gyuhyuk... there's more to him than anyone knows but instead they just called out his belligerence over everything else instead of trying to fucking see with their goddamn eyes...

Everything was right fucking there...