🎧 homophonic | pcs | yukichi (fukuzawa)

[silicone]

There's no need to fear the past. The past is just a memory.

(in retrospect i regret my choice of filter name)

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[silicone]

I begged them to pick me.

[ he thought he was going to die too. surprise number 2. ]

They wouldn't let me. I don't know why. I'm the most useless of them all.

[allmenare]

[Oh, Eiden...]

You have a capacity for kindness and courage that most people could only dream of. In a place defined by death, we need that more than anything.

[silicone]

Kindness won't save anyone tomorrow. [ the insecurity is just... shifting to anger. ] The fact is, someone innocent is going to die because of bullshit and I can't do a damn thing about it.

[ is it raining? jk it's a tear on the top of fukuzawa's hand. ] I was trying so fucking hard... Gyuhyuk... he was just hurting.

I hurt him. Just for a bunch of people who wouldn't believe us.

[allmenare]

[EIDEN AAAAA

Fukuzawa lifts up a hand to cup the side of Eiden's face, his thumb wiping away the tears on that side.]

You're right, we can't do anything about it tomorrow. But come Monday, we'll start to rectify this.

I can plant a compulsion in someone's mind. There's no guarantee they will act on it, but they will feel a strong urge to act on that compulsion, strong enough that they might do it if they don't know what's happening.

You check the teams, and tell me who to use it on.

[silicone]

... Compulsion?

[ frowning softly... his mouth slips ] Yukichi... what the hell? How are you going to do that?

[allmenare]

I have my ways. It can only be used once though, so we have to make it count.

[silicone]

Once... [ he nods softly. ] Then I'd have to be extra sure.

For now, I want you to save it unless you really, truly need it. [ he doesn't want to imagine a world where maybe he fucked up and fukuzawa could have perhaps saved someone else, saved himself... something... ] I can't be sure right now if I can find out who the person is, but.

[ and this time he turns to face him. his eyes are just. so wet. and red. he's been crying on and off and it shows. ] If I can come back to you 100% certain... then we can use it.

[allmenare]

Of course. I'll hold onto it for now, until we're sure. But if you check a team with four people left and see them in first place, tell me immediately.

[Because there's only one way that could have happened.

But oh, these tears. He pulls up the sleeve of his kimono over his hand and tries to wipe some of the wetness away.]

[silicone]

[ he allows this, but god he looks... kind of frustrated and upset still. ]

There was proof that we didn't do it. We all... every one of us... I...

[ he shakes a little. ]

I don't care what anyone says. Gyuhyuk... there's more to him than anyone knows but instead they just called out his belligerence over everything else instead of trying to fucking see with their goddamn eyes...

Everything was right fucking there...

[allmenare]

...it was.

I still don't know why my team wasn't voted out.

[Not that they did any murder either, but that fucking monkey.]

[silicone]

Because they were climbing all over each other to sacrifice themselves for one another.

Who would anyone rather vote for... than a guy who's freaking out and looking guilty because of his trauma.

Everyone believed it was us. [ unspoken, even if fukuzawa says he trusts him: even you? ]

[allmenare]

[He doesn't know what to say here, so he falls silent.

But he'll keep holding onto Eiden's hand for as long as he needs.]

[silicone]

[ he will hold onto it tightly for a long while before he will eventually let go and slowly start to get to his feet. ]

... I have to go. I...

[ he gives him a very small smile, but his lip just tremble a little. ]

I should go spend time with my team... I... thank you for sitting with me a while... and listening to me.

[allmenare]

[He's a little reluctant to let go, but he understands.]

Whatever you need, I'm here for you. You'll know where to find me.

[silicone]

[ he nods, and before stepping too far, just leans in very carefully and smoothes some of his hair back from his forehead to just.

kiss right there at the crown of his head. ]

I know...

I'll see you tomorrow.

[allmenare]

[He'll tip his head forward a bit so Eiden can do that, he has rights.]

I'll be there for you, and for the rest of them too.

[He wants to be up on that stage, giving his life to protect others from a horrific injustice. But failing that, he can support Hot Mess as best as he can.]