Hey, it takes two for that. So, I'm sorry too... [ tilting his head ] It's been a rough few weeks for us... right? Understatement of the year, I know, but words don't really do it justice.
Fighting for something like happiness is necessary in a place like this.
It's been a bad few weeks. [she'll agree with that immediately.] And happiness is - I don't know if I know how to fight for that. What does that mean to you?
Fighting to remember everyone that's brought me even a little happiness, even when it hurts. Remembering how far I've gotten with the help of those people, lifting me up in their own ways.
[ he holds onto the obsidian stone around his neck tightly. ]
[that's really so nice, and she smiles a little to hear him talk like that, but there's something desperately sad about it.]
I don't know if I know how to do that, Eiden. It just hurts. It hurts so bad, and I don't want to try to be happy remembering them. I just want to get them back.
I'd give anything to hold them again. I know. It... really... really hurts. Like a knife, Ylfa.
But that's why we have to find some other way. A way that doesn't involve sending four people to their death in one night. And a fifth on Sunday. There's got to be either some other way to get points or some way to break the system from the inside.
I won't believe there isn't. Every game's got something you can twist. A tactic, a measure, a power we can use.... maybe it's optimistic, but I don't care.
[she's just sort of quiet, listening to him. it hurts to hear it described that way, too. her features change into a frown, ears drooping.]
I understand. It's ugly. It's awful. It would be so much nicer if there was a way that wasn't ugly. And you aren't an ugly person. You're the kind of person who is supposed to get a happy ending. So it makes sense you think that a way like that has to exist.
Yeah. [she smiles a little at him. he really is a kind person.] Can I ask you something? I don't want you to think I'm talking back or trying to argue or anything.
But...what happens if you're wrong? What do we do?
I've been talking a lot to the Reapers, and the truth is, some of them think it's already too late; that there's no team that could get enough points to save everybody.
There's not going to be a team with enough points because we're all killing each other in the first place. It's a bad game. We all know that... [ this is more of him just talking to himself, cheek in his palm ] There's no way to transfer points even is there? No... ability or thing or item...
That just feels like something that should exist...
We've asked and asked about things like that. I would never - [she trails off.] I wouldn't agree to certain things without finding out a lot first.
[her voice is just sad.]
Eiden, I'm saying these things because I feel like - what you would do to fight for Yakumo if the only choice was to do it or lose him forever? Would you do something terrible, if you were sure that was the only way, or would you decide to let go of him and of yourself? [she takes a breath, and speaks very quickly.] And I know that's so unfair to say, it's so unfair that you have to fight for him or consider these things, and that it's my fault you do. And I want you to know that if we're the ones who win in the end and we can pick people to save, of course I would do everything I can to save him, because I know you lost someone you love very much and neither of you deserved that. But I don't know that we will be. It's only me and Haru, now.
I don't think either decision is wrong, exactly. But...
[ and boy he looks miserable about it for a few moments, brows furrowed tightly. because this is a very hard thing for him to say, and he's not even sure if he should be saying it. but he's going to.
lifting his head up. ] We have to protect you two no matter what if we stand a chance. So... there are a lot of things I would do. That I know that I need to do to actually be able to fight for him in any capacity.
Your team has the most points, Ylfa. We have to protect you and Haru now.
[she does look touched by this, but more than anything she looks sad to see him looking so sad.]
I know. Though it's still possible that no matter how hard everyone tries, Haru and I will die, and another team is going to decide what happens to all of us. Still...I - I promise I'm trying my best for everyone, okay? In my own, awful, ugly way, I'm trying for everybody.
[ he seems to immediately turn to her when she says the words "ugly ways" shaking his head sharply. ]
I know you are. You've been trying your hardest this whole damn time and... I realize that now. And that's why I'm going to do my best to help you no matter what, okay? So don't go being mean to yourself saying all of those things like ugly and awful. We're made to do this, they haven't given us any choice but to do ugly things. What happened these past few weeks, it's awful... but I can't let you say anymore things like that about yourself without calling you out on it.
[ so he holds his hands out to her. ]
Shake on it with me. We're gonna do what it takes to make this happy ending happen for everyone. For you. For Haru... for Gerard... for Yakumo and Shenhe and Fei Du and everyone else who's been erased... everyone.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Yeah, that was insaneβthe dumb bombs... how could I forget?
no subject
no subject
Because, I don't know. Our version was cooler... though that's just my opinion. We still got some major points.
no subject
no subject
[ just kicks his feet a little. ]
What was our team name again? Something... cats...
no subject
[that was definitely bait.]
no subject
In retrospect, should have called it Wolfpack or something. My b.
no subject
[...]
Sorry we haven't talked so much lately.
no subject
Hey, it takes two for that. So, I'm sorry too... [ tilting his head ] It's been a rough few weeks for us... right? Understatement of the year, I know, but words don't really do it justice.
Fighting for something like happiness is necessary in a place like this.
no subject
[she doesn't really blame him for that.]
It's been a bad few weeks. [she'll agree with that immediately.] And happiness is - I don't know if I know how to fight for that. What does that mean to you?
no subject
Fighting to remember everyone that's brought me even a little happiness, even when it hurts. Remembering how far I've gotten with the help of those people, lifting me up in their own ways.
[ he holds onto the obsidian stone around his neck tightly. ]
Even when they're gone.
no subject
I don't know if I know how to do that, Eiden. It just hurts. It hurts so bad, and I don't want to try to be happy remembering them. I just want to get them back.
no subject
But that's why we have to find some other way. A way that doesn't involve sending four people to their death in one night. And a fifth on Sunday. There's got to be either some other way to get points or some way to break the system from the inside.
I won't believe there isn't. Every game's got something you can twist. A tactic, a measure, a power we can use.... maybe it's optimistic, but I don't care.
no subject
I understand. It's ugly. It's awful. It would be so much nicer if there was a way that wasn't ugly. And you aren't an ugly person. You're the kind of person who is supposed to get a happy ending. So it makes sense you think that a way like that has to exist.
no subject
We all deserve a better story than the one we have here right now. I don't think whoever's writing this gets to hold the pen.
[ kicks legs ] I can't do much, I'm just a guy. All I can do is hope that maybe if I keep people's spirits up we'll find a way through it.
no subject
But...what happens if you're wrong? What do we do?
no subject
... If I'm wrong, then we're gonna have to find some other way to earn those stupid points.
Too bad we can't just hack it like a video game or something. No cheat codes here...
no subject
And if that happens, it's going to be horrible.
no subject
That just feels like something that should exist...
no subject
[her voice is just sad.]
Eiden, I'm saying these things because I feel like - what you would do to fight for Yakumo if the only choice was to do it or lose him forever? Would you do something terrible, if you were sure that was the only way, or would you decide to let go of him and of yourself? [she takes a breath, and speaks very quickly.] And I know that's so unfair to say, it's so unfair that you have to fight for him or consider these things, and that it's my fault you do. And I want you to know that if we're the ones who win in the end and we can pick people to save, of course I would do everything I can to save him, because I know you lost someone you love very much and neither of you deserved that. But I don't know that we will be. It's only me and Haru, now.
I don't think either decision is wrong, exactly. But...
no subject
[ and boy he looks miserable about it for a few moments, brows furrowed tightly. because this is a very hard thing for him to say, and he's not even sure if he should be saying it. but he's going to.
lifting his head up. ] We have to protect you two no matter what if we stand a chance. So... there are a lot of things I would do. That I know that I need to do to actually be able to fight for him in any capacity.
Your team has the most points, Ylfa. We have to protect you and Haru now.
no subject
[she does look touched by this, but more than anything she looks sad to see him looking so sad.]
I know. Though it's still possible that no matter how hard everyone tries, Haru and I will die, and another team is going to decide what happens to all of us. Still...I - I promise I'm trying my best for everyone, okay? In my own, awful, ugly way, I'm trying for everybody.
no subject
[ he seems to immediately turn to her when she says the words "ugly ways" shaking his head sharply. ]
I know you are. You've been trying your hardest this whole damn time and... I realize that now. And that's why I'm going to do my best to help you no matter what, okay? So don't go being mean to yourself saying all of those things like ugly and awful. We're made to do this, they haven't given us any choice but to do ugly things. What happened these past few weeks, it's awful... but I can't let you say anymore things like that about yourself without calling you out on it.
[ so he holds his hands out to her. ]
Shake on it with me. We're gonna do what it takes to make this happy ending happen for everyone. For you. For Haru... for Gerard... for Yakumo and Shenhe and Fei Du and everyone else who's been erased... everyone.
no subject
she will take his hands. both of them, and shake both of them at the same time.]
I will. We'll do it, and save them.
no subject
I'm here for you, okay? Whatever you need, I'll do my best to help you so we can see the people we love again.
(no subject)