silicone | 🎧 homophonic | pcs

That's why...

[ his voice trails off for a moment and he glances downwards at their hands joined. he shifts his fingers, just so maybe he can slide them between his own. ]

... Yukichi...

[ it doesn't make it right or fair, but who said the game was fair, and who said any of this was right? eiden is mad, he's mad at a lot of people, but the anger has diffused somewhat with at least the finality of the act. and here in the grass, being told something like this... ]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry that someone you trusted so much...

[ he just trails off, eyes shifting away. god it's just. a lot. it sucks. everything sucks. ]

It's...how things are, sometimes.

[But this is why he doesn't open up his heart often. If he had a nickel for every time he fought a former partner to the death he would have two nickels, which isn't a lot but it's really weird it happened twice.]

I don't know if it's right. I don't know for certain that Simon is innocent. But when I put my trust into someone, I don't revoke it lightly. And I trust him to tell me the truth, if he did kill.

[But he hasn't yet, so.]

But I can't just give up on him because things look bad. He's skittish about people, I get the feeling he's been betrayed before. I'm not going to do that to him.

[ eiden is still for a long time as he listens to this patiently. he's trying to understand the logic, but THE FUCKING MONKEY, MAN. he doesn't say anything though. sometimes, you know when someone won't budge, that it's a matter of time, and what happens in that time. ]

Simon texted me... he was pretty upset. Said he felt really guilty about the whole thing.

He's worried that it's painted a target on the team. [ it has. that's it. ] If you need to... I wouldn't be upset if you used that compulsion thing to keep your team safe next week, okay? Especially coming hot of that last trial...

If it could affect everyone, I would use it on Monday to direct everyone's attention away from Simon.

[And onto him.]

But it can only affect one person.

[ squeezes tighter. because man. yeah. that'd be way too powerful for this sort of place to give them, wouldn't it be? frankly, eiden still thinks simon is hella suspicious, he doesn't like the fact that if he was lying, everything slid into place just right around that.

he just. closes his eyes instead. because if he thinks about it anymore, he's going to explode. he just breathes. deep. ]

Mm... of course.

[ reaches up to tug softly on whatever part of his outfit is closest. haori. kimono. etc. ]

Lay down with me, it hurts my eyeballs to have to keep looking up. [ he ragdolled like a bethesda character in the vroom room during the snake attack. his head hurts. with a little tug to the corner of his mouth. ] Won't do anything untoward. Promise.

Edited 2023-07-10 03:05 (UTC)

You don't have to put up that pretense today.

[He knows Eiden is Like This but he also has eyes. Yakumo was so important to him, and Fukuzawa doesn't even expect a playful front after all of that.

Which is why he'll settle down on the ground and then life his arm up, offering space for Eiden to get closer if he wants. No Untoward meanings, he just wants to help Eiden feel safer.]

No idea what you mean... heh...

[ smiling at him anyways, even if it's. sad. still, the arm lifts and he instantly shuffles closer. it's true, his head hurts, he's gotten the damage healed, but he's still kind of rattled. he shifts until he can bury his nose into his shoulder, breathing in deeply.

he slings his arm around him too, nestling in comfortably. ]

This is good. I like this.

You can stay like this for as long as you like.

[Once Eiden is situated, Fukuzawa will fold his arm over Eiden's back, holding him there. It's a loose hold so Eiden can pull away if he wants, but it's his way of saying 'I'm here.']

I don't think I've laid down with anyone since Ranpo was younger. He used to have nightmares occasionally and would come hide in my bed. But he outgrew that a long time ago, even before we took in Yosano.

[ it's perfect. eiden just shifts a little at one point, mostly to nose against his neck. he doesn't do anything beyond that, just tucking himself in. as he says that, he chuckles a little: ]

That's sweet... poor kid. I think I said this before but, the ones you take in are really, really lucky.

[ shifting a little and letting his hand walk up his side to just pass slowly over his back. ] Who's Yosano?

You say that, but I always felt like the lucky one.

[They keep his heart out of the darkness and his mind focused on saving others. He probably wouldn't be alive without them.]

Yosano was the second member of the Agency. She's Ranpo's age, so she was about 15 when we took her in.

[A pause.]

...she has the ability to heal any wound, so long as the person is still alive. And someone else was trying to use her for her ability despite how clearly she was hurting inside from it. Ranpo and I didn't agree with that, so we stole her away from the situation.

When she realized we wanted her to stay with us for her kindness, not her ability, she readily agreed. She's now the company doctor, she takes care of our physicals, vaccinations, and those sorts of things. She does use her ability sometimes, but we never ask for it. We're happy to have her as a doctor, not a healer.

[ oh he's in awe. she sounds really cool... these people were pretty young when they met him... the fact that they have such a comfortable place under his roof. he just smiles about that. ]

That's amazing... it sounds like you're just what the other needed. Right place, right time. Glad she gets to be with you guys instead of that shitty place.

[ beaming at him just a bit more ] You have a big heart, Yukichi... you're just very careful about who is let inside.

I think it's something we have in common.

[He never would have been able to open his heart up if Eiden didn't open his first.]

It's dangerous though. You have to be careful who you let in, or else you'll end up getting hurt in the end.

... I guess we do.

[ he admits it, quiet, reluctant. the grass is warm and soft and he's trailing his nose gently up fukuzawa's pulse with a soft chuckle. ]

It's dangerous to be alone too... so I'm glad that you let me in.

[ he trails off, lifting his hand to cup the side of fukuzawa's jaw and just. hold his face gently. ]

[He feels that, he responds by cupping the back of Eiden's head with his hand. ]

We can rest out here if you're tired.

[ his expression shifts into something more neutral, only because he... doesn't know what he wants. he's tired, but every time he closes his eyes, he—

just presses their foreheads together softly, lingering in the warmth. ]

Yeah. I... Just for a little while. You don't have to stay long if you have places to be.

Edited 2023-07-10 11:02 (UTC)

My time is for you, Eiden.

[He won't be going anywhere until Eiden tells him he needs to go somewhere.]

You don't have to say that, you know. I'm... I'll be okay.

[ he will not tell him to go anywhere, but he will curl up even closer. he just furrows his brow a little, but only because he's trying not to tear up again. he's. so tired of crying. ]

But thank you. I'm going to be a little greedy with it.

Be as greedy as you want.

[He can cry if he needs to, Fukuzawa won't say anything. But he also would understand not wanting to cry too.]

[ i didn't get this notif wah. ]

... I don't know what I'll do without him.

He was one of the first people I met... when I ended up in Klein. Beside the old Grand Sorcerer's familiars.

[Oh, how his heart tightens when he hears that.]

...I'm sorry, Eiden.

🎧 homophonic | pcs | yukichi (fukuzawa)

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