[ we do not have cups because wenzhou's not scared of eiden's cooties and i was making him carry enough as it is. ]
... I understand that people will be upset. It's their right to be, and they can even be upset with me for sticking to such an asinine piece of evidence that made no sense no matter which way you looked at it - as suspicious, or simply nothing - which caused them to lose Gerard.
If they were planning to do this kind of thing, to kill for points and be the winning team to bring the dead back? They could have roped people in on it. They could've found willing volunteers. [ he's oddly calm, still, as he talks about this. ] But they let Yakumo take the fall for something they did, and were doing what they judged Gyuhyuk guilty for, before.
I'm sorry to say that I'm not that upset to have watched them lose someone after they took Shenhe, Yakumo, and Fei Du from us. But I'll help keep an eye on them to make sure that all that death wasn't for nothing.
... They shouldn't be upset with you, we all have to vote, and in the end, this was the case that we somehow found the most evidence for and could put together the most. People were working on other cases... cases I wished I could have done more for, [ fukuzawa... shen qingqiu... ] but...
In the end, this one had the answer we needed. This one confirmed the theory we had... unfortunately.
[ just hugging a knee. ]
I won't feel upset either... They let us take the fall and look like killers for ten minutes and then took Yakumo away from us... all without batting an eye. [ he's trying to control his voice, and takes a breath ] And then they tried to do it again. It's only because Fei Du seemed to avoid the use of psychs that we were able to see through to the actual evidence. [ he rubs his head. ]
Fei Du went with them willingly. [ he takes a drink, cool as a cucumber. eiden knows him well enough to know he'd be absolutely livid about this in reality. ] Agreed when they talked about their reasons, and what they wanted to do. He made them promise to revive him and look out for me in exchange.
Now, Gerard wants me to look after Ylfa and Haru. I will, because even if I'm never going to forgive them for what they've done - to any of us - they're kids. Kids with blood on their hands, but kids. And Fei Du would have died for nothing if froggystyle is completely wiped out.
[ swishing the wine around in the bottle, he stares into it. ]
If Haru wouldn't have leaned on the rulebook, confessed without confessing, then I was prepared to present the Lexus key. It had that blue dye on it, clear as day, and it was separate from everything else found in that location. Gerard went on that mission with him. It was a blatant clue left behind by Fei Du, in lieu of letting psychs be used.
it's pretty much at this point, where the calm exterior starts to feel wrong. eiden takes the bottle from him as he starts to stare into it, drinking a little more because fuck it. he needs to in order to parse any of this out anymore. ]
Wenzhou...
Hey are you feeling alright?
[ a beat ]
You just seem like... you're a little more subdued than usual.
That does stand out as odd, actually, now that I really think about it. I bought a new pack from Aika on top of everything else just because I knew I was running low, not because I needed one right then...
[ this is going to piss him off later. ]
Well-meaning as it probably is, I think I'd rather just have my emotions. This isn't quite what I meant when I said I wanted to grieve in peace.
[ he reaches for the wine bottle, taking a drink and thinking over it for a moment. ]
... I can rationalize it now when I'm not angry about it. So there's that. I'll be pissed, still, but it's probably someone wanting me to not hurt. Well-intentioned the same way that it was with Shenhe and Matsui, but that just made it worse when it wore off.
That was like putting a bandaid on a crack in a dam, and the crack spreading even further across until it finally breaks - and all the more terrible for it.
You should be allowed to grieve, it's not like you'd go around shooting people's kneecaps off.
[ eiden does not finish that sentence with "even though maybe someone here would deserve it." instead he just hunches over a little quietly, because he's Mad! what the Fuck! ]
If you're going to fucking tranquilize anyone whose lost someone, why not just tranquilize everyone then? It's stupid.
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[ we do not have cups because wenzhou's not scared of eiden's cooties and i was making him carry enough as it is. ]
... I understand that people will be upset. It's their right to be, and they can even be upset with me for sticking to such an asinine piece of evidence that made no sense no matter which way you looked at it - as suspicious, or simply nothing - which caused them to lose Gerard.
If they were planning to do this kind of thing, to kill for points and be the winning team to bring the dead back? They could have roped people in on it. They could've found willing volunteers. [ he's oddly calm, still, as he talks about this. ] But they let Yakumo take the fall for something they did, and were doing what they judged Gyuhyuk guilty for, before.
I'm sorry to say that I'm not that upset to have watched them lose someone after they took Shenhe, Yakumo, and Fei Du from us. But I'll help keep an eye on them to make sure that all that death wasn't for nothing.
no subject
... They shouldn't be upset with you, we all have to vote, and in the end, this was the case that we somehow found the most evidence for and could put together the most. People were working on other cases... cases I wished I could have done more for, [ fukuzawa... shen qingqiu... ] but...
In the end, this one had the answer we needed. This one confirmed the theory we had... unfortunately.
[ just hugging a knee. ]
I won't feel upset either... They let us take the fall and look like killers for ten minutes and then took Yakumo away from us... all without batting an eye. [ he's trying to control his voice, and takes a breath ] And then they tried to do it again. It's only because Fei Du seemed to avoid the use of psychs that we were able to see through to the actual evidence. [ he rubs his head. ]
no subject
Now, Gerard wants me to look after Ylfa and Haru. I will, because even if I'm never going to forgive them for what they've done - to any of us - they're kids. Kids with blood on their hands, but kids. And Fei Du would have died for nothing if froggystyle is completely wiped out.
[ swishing the wine around in the bottle, he stares into it. ]
If Haru wouldn't have leaned on the rulebook, confessed without confessing, then I was prepared to present the Lexus key. It had that blue dye on it, clear as day, and it was separate from everything else found in that location. Gerard went on that mission with him. It was a blatant clue left behind by Fei Du, in lieu of letting psychs be used.
no subject
it's pretty much at this point, where the calm exterior starts to feel wrong. eiden takes the bottle from him as he starts to stare into it, drinking a little more because fuck it. he needs to in order to parse any of this out anymore. ]
Wenzhou...
Hey are you feeling alright?
[ a beat ]
You just seem like... you're a little more subdued than usual.
[ how else do you phrase it? ]
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[ nothing about this seems strange to him? hm. ]
Ever since the erasure ended.
no subject
[ uh. ]
You're just feeling super at peace. Just like that, huh?
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[ l m a o ]
Not long after, yeah. [ pausing, thoughtfully. ] You think I'm cursed?
no subject
[ bumping their knees together. ]
I think so. Maybe they thought they were doing you a favor...
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[ this is going to piss him off later. ]
Well-meaning as it probably is, I think I'd rather just have my emotions. This isn't quite what I meant when I said I wanted to grieve in peace.
no subject
[ frowns. ]
Maybe Kyoko can help?
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I'm not sure. [ hrm ] She probably could, but it happened so late in the day I'm not sure if there'd be a point in using up that energy.
If it lasts into tomorrow I'll ask her.
no subject
That works. I'll be pissed off about it today.
[ he doesn't like it! but! what else are you going to do? he can't heal him himself, and he definitely would. his jaw works a little. ]
You can be pissed off about it tomorrow.
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... I can rationalize it now when I'm not angry about it. So there's that. I'll be pissed, still, but it's probably someone wanting me to not hurt. Well-intentioned the same way that it was with Shenhe and Matsui, but that just made it worse when it wore off.
That was like putting a bandaid on a crack in a dam, and the crack spreading even further across until it finally breaks - and all the more terrible for it.
no subject
[ eiden does not finish that sentence with "even though maybe someone here would deserve it." instead he just hunches over a little quietly, because he's Mad! what the Fuck! ]
If you're going to fucking tranquilize anyone whose lost someone, why not just tranquilize everyone then? It's stupid.